Dus jij denkt dat het moeilijk is om je klanten te verleiden groene eieren en ham te laten eten? Wacht dan maar tot je ervoor wilt zorgen dat je klanten je selfservice-features gaan gebruiken ...
Hi there, I am Sam, Sam-I-am How may I be of service, ma'am?
Oh Sam, my print job’s stuck in queue and now I don't know what to do. Can you put me through to Paul? He always helps me when I call.
Well sorry miss, since recently, self-service first’s our policy. So would you log a call for me?
I would not like to log a call, I would not like that, not at all. I just want to speak to Paul.
Would you then fill out a form? You should, conforming to our latest norm.
I do not want to use a form, whether or not it is your norm. I do not want to log a call, I only want to speak to Paul.
Would you chat with our new bot? Your colleagues use that bot a lot.
I would not chat with your new bot and your new form, I will use not. I would not like to log a call. Can’t you put me through to Paul?
Would you? Could you? Ask a peer? You have some pretty clever peers out here.
Let me make it very clear: I would not, could not ask a peer. I would not chat with your new bot. And your new form, I will use not. I would not like to log a call. Why can’t I just talk to Paul?
Would you? Could you? Ask our cat?
No Sam-I-Am, I don't want that!
What if our cat would wear a hat?
I will not chat with your hatted cat! I would not, could not ask a peer. I would not chat with your new bot. And your new form, I will use not. I would not like to log a call. Can I please, please talk to Paul?
Would you search our knowledge base?
I don't know where to find that place!
Would you read our FAQs? Would you read our new how-to’s?
I do not want your FAQs! I would not use your new how-tos! I would much rather eat my shoes! I would not ask a peer or bot! And your new form, I will use not! I would not like to log a call! CAN’T YOU JUST PUT ME THROUGH TO PAUL?
Oh sorry! I forgot to say: Paul is on a holiday. You do not like our FAQs, you say. But try them, and perhaps you may! Try them and you may, I say!
Sam! If you will let me be, I will try them. You will see.
(... And she tries them ...)
Say! I followed the steps in your how-to and now my print job has gone through! Now I do, I do like your FAQs! I like your practical how-to’s! Next time I will ask a peer, one of the many clever peers in here! I might even ask your chatty bot and your new form, I'll use a lot! I will no longer call and ask for Paul, From now on I will log a call!